Weird Journal

I HAVE NO IDEA WHY I'M DOING THIS JOURNAL. MAYBE JUST TO SAY I'M ALIVE AND NOT VERY FUNCTIONAL ON MANY LEVELS. I'M ALWAYS BEGGING FOR UNDERSTANDING FROM THE PEOPLE I WATCH AND CAN'T KEEP UP WIT!H!. YOU GUYS ARE SO PROLIFIC!

Okay, I don't like the cap lock. this type is small so it was my remedy. It sucked, so moving on. 
speaking of sucking, my illness in my hands and feet is getting worse. I'm having spasms and bad cramping in my fingers and toes.I have very little joy left. (Luckily, I do have some joy and he knows who he is). I have to get back on track with regular life.

This is becoming a rant and I didn't want that.
I'm just hoping everyone s doing well. Better than me.
I know journals are for venting but not today. Today is for an update and to let you all know I do little more than writing (as you've noticed)
The rest of my time is spent working.

If you have time drop me a comment to let me know how life is if we haven't connected in awhile.